Observe: notice or perceive (something) and register it as being significant.
Welcome to Day 15 of Soul Blossoming A to Z
Today’s letter:
Today’s blooming topic: Observe!
In order to observe we need to pay attention
We also need to take a step back. When we’re fully engaged in something, it’s difficult to observe it at the same time. Through regular meditative practice, we can learn to step back and observe ourselves. Through this self-observation, we can see patterns that may no longer serve us.
When I taught parent-child classes, I spoke to the parents about this. Because certainly, our children can reactivate all sorts of old patterns. I would tell the story of how when my older daughter, Rachel, was little, at first I would rush to her every time she fell to make sure she was ok. Of course, my underlying assumption was that she was hurt and needed me. Then I realized at some point that I was causing her to be upset. I trained myself to count to 10 and watch her and then go to her, if necessary. Sometimes she did need me. But most often, she would stand up and continue on her way.
That was only the beginning of my observations of myself and my children. I learned many things about myself and my daughters through observing. Sometimes I took what I observed and examined it more closely in my meditation, asking for spiritual help to transform my old patterns into something that served me and my family in the present. Sometimes I also sat with my observations of my daughters, trying to understand what I observed and learning to give them more space and trust. (I also did this with the children in my classes. In Waldorf schools, child observation is a highly developed art. Here’s a link to a compilation of articles on child and class observations, Waldorf-style)
Observing without judgment or self-criticism
As I glanced around the internet looking for interesting ideas about observation, I found all sorts of information about the observing self. For example, check out this article from the Psychology of Joy.
They point out in that article a very important aspect of observation–doing so without judgment or self-criticism:
“The observing self is completely free of self judgment or self criticism. It is fundamentally a space of loving compassion and illumination.”
Why there’s even a book–The Observing Self: Mysticism and Psychotherapy by Arthur J. Deikman, MD. I haven’t read it, but the title sounds interesting!
Many of us blossoms tend to make ourselves wilt with our self-judgment or self-criticism. Let’s learn to observe ourselves without judgment!
Through loving observation, we can truly blossom and come home to ourselves (you can also check out my post about finding home)
Thanks for stopping by! xoxo
