Finding the angel in the marble (an homage to Michaelangelo and sculpting a life)

Finding the angel by letting go of excess.

Finding the angel in the marble–that’s how Michelangelo sculpted. He released the figure from the stone. That’s what I’m trying to do with my life. I’ve begun chipping away the stone that keeps me stuck in my life. Some of it’s material stuff and some of it is emotional/soul stuff. But a lot of it is all mixed up together.

I’ve been reading a lot about minimalism. The book I’m listening to right now is Soulful Simplicity by Courtney Carver. I also love her blog, Be More with Less.

In addition, I’ve been going through my physical stuff. I just gave away a boatload of books. I’ll write about that experience soon. 

Setting my own things free–it’s not easy!

And I cleaned up my bedroom–took a lot of stuff out of it so now it feels clean and clear. One thing that had been sitting on my trunk since I moved here last December was this athame

and this rattle.

I made the athame about 28 years ago (I only remember because I got pregnant with my older daughter during that time) as part of a women’s mysteries class that I was taking.

I’ve never used it. Although it’s been sitting around in my house, so people could have seen it, I’ve never shown it to anyone or talked about it.

Chiseling away at my own resistance

I’ve been packing stuff up to give away. But yesterday when I came to the athame and rattle, I just moved them onto a shelf in the living room. But as I drove home from the dentist today, listening to Soulful Simplicity and Courtney speaking about her own journey of letting go of precious things, I kept thinking about these two items.

For me, they represent a person I think I want to be–a pagan priestess, perhaps. But since I’ve never used them, that shows me that I don’t really want to be that–I’d have taken action by now if I did. 

Also, I realized that seeing those things every day that I never use but think that someday I will or should just makes me feel bad about myself. They make me feel stuck. Those objects stop–or at least slow me down–from finding the angel in the stone. They are the stone that needs to be chipped away. 

I’ve never carved stone myself, but I used to watch the high school kids at the school I used to teach at carving stone. It takes a lot of work, a lot of strength and persistence to carve away the stone and release the angel that lives inside.

Carving away the excess in my life doesn’t take the same physical energy, but it certainly takes a lot of emotional energy.

The cost of holding on

But what I’m realizing now is how much energy it takes to keep that stuff that I feel guilty about not using. Courtney says to let go of the guilt with the stuff.

Good-bye athame! Good-bye rattle! Hello  angel–I’m finding you.

What do you have that holds you back? Are you ready to let it go? Does anyone else feel that subtle guilt and use stuff to hold it in place? 

Or–here’s one of my favorite weird ideas–keep stuff around to create an image of who you are or think you should be? Is that for yourself or those who see your stuff–or both? For me, I think it’s both, because I notice that I feel kind of exposed and vulnerable as I let go of certain things. And letting go of things made by hand–by myself or my family (and we all like to make stuff!) causes the most emotional pain.

Taking one step at a time–it’s enough for today

I have a lot more that I want to sort through and release. But some of the hard things are coming–old journals, paintings, puppets that I’ve made and used for years in my teaching. Sigh–but one step at a time.

For today, letting go of these ritual objects that have seen no rituals is enough.

Another favorite topic is Simplicity Parenting–from the book by Kim John Payne. If you have kids at home, check out my introduction to Simplicity parenting.

And for more of my struggles with minimalism, check out my post on Minimalist Rag(e) (which includes a poem!)

Thanks for stopping by. And good luck finding your angel!

xoxo